It's a Joy-ish Life

The other day Jessica and I were diligently working away on our plans for global domination new business opportunities, when across from me, I heard a stifled giggle.

“Dude, you seriously need to read this!”

Coming around our partner desk to see what new source of procrastination inspiration she had discovered, I found what I’m sure was intended as a self-help article written by a by person claiming to be a Joyologist.

*Insert gaging noise* Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Honestly, I applaud those trying to spread positivity and encourage others to live a healthier and more fulfilled life, and I also think that outside-the-box job titles are rad, but seriously???? A JOYOLOGIST?!?!?

THE MADNESS HAS GOT TO STOP!!!!!

Listen closely people. Life is not, nor should it be, all about JOY!

It’s not a joyfest. There is no joy on tap. It is not a 24/7 joy buffet!

This great big thing we call the human experience is filled with a million more interesting, and considerably more useful emotions besides joy.

For example, what about anger?

Obviously, being angry all the time is not useful, but what about when anger motivates? What about the anger motivated by injustice, waste or plain stupidity that churns in your belly until you can’t stand it any longer. It’s this anger that leads to ACTION! Whether you scream, yell, or complete an entire Kevin Bacon in Footloose, dancing your way through an empty warehouse montage; when you are through your anger will thrust you forward, helping you to fight for your cause.

Non-stop joy does not inspire action, it breeds contentment.

Then, what about fear?

“The call is coming from inside the house!” produces blood-curdling fear, but what about the other type of fear that produces more than the basic flight response. You know that squirming tickle in your gut when you are taking a risk? That’s the type of fear that reminds you that what you are attempting is important, and going to help you achieve greatness. It’s the squirm that propels you to prepare and practice. This fear psychs you up and gets you ready for your next big opportunity.

Non-stop joy does not provide challenge, it maintains the status quo.

Finally, what about sadness?

For just as there is yin and yang, good and evil, and life and death, without sadness there can never be joy. Just as the saying goes, “You don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone”, sadness reminds us to cherish the things in our lives we love most. As we move through times of sadness and grief, we come out the other side with a deeper sense of gratitude and renewed life purpose.

Without the bad, there can be no good and thus, no joy.

In the long run seeking never ending joy has nothing to do with seeking happiness.  Killing yourself in order to achieve Non-Stop Joy is about seeking perfection.  The perfect, drama-free, everyone-loves-everyone and nothing bad ever happens life.

Um, in case you missed the memo, a perfect life does not exist.

Life can be unfair.  Life can be exhilarating. Life can be a bitch, but no matter what, it's better than the alternative.

So, to all the Joy Junkies out there trying to achieve the impossible Polly says,

STOP!  ARRETEZ!  HALT!

Instead of wasting your time trying to find a legal, non-narcotic way to be blissed out all the time, how about accepting the value of a Joy-ish life.

A glimpse into MY Joyish Life

Believe me, by embracing a Joy-ish existence, you'll actually end up with a life filled with more joy in the long run.

Heh, what can I say, sometimes life can be a little weird like that.

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The Door Exists!

So, a few days ago I posted Ponderings.  An illustration of all the bizarre and defeating shit that runs through my head on a regular basis.

After reading it, Jessica (business partner, best friend and previously stated biggest fan) loved the "What the Hell!" message, but also felt the need to smack some serious sense into me.

Deciding physically harming her business partner might hurt business, she created this for me instead.


 DUDE, IT'S THE DOOR!
And guess, what?
  

There was no handle!  All I had to do was reach out and rip,

and what was waiting for me on the other side?
 

Yup, Polly now officially has her own pom-poms!
 





 



 

The cookies were even warm!!! 



Perfection! 

 

Just the perfect kick in the pants reminding me to practice what I preach,

ignore the Doubt Demons and just, 

 

BELIEVE!

 

Happy Friday!  Remember to do something this weekend to remind yourself of your own unique AWESOMENESS!

 

 

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Ponderings

In January I took a writing class. 

Not aimed at teaching style or structure, this class helped me overcome writer’s block, accept less than perfection and most importantly, enjoy writing again.

On the first day of class, our instructor handed each of us a piece of paper with a door on it. The first line on the page read,

“This is the door to a new writing life, waiting to be opened by you.”

Our instructor said, describe the door.

I wrote,

“This door is boring! My door is not brown! It doesn’t look anything like an average door. My door is exciting. My door has polka dots and glitter. Behind my door, Achievement, Accomplishment and Success are enjoying Mocha Lattes and fresh chocolate chip cookies. My door is begging me to open it!”

I know with 100% certainty that this reaction was Polly’s. My alter ego has always believed I am sassy, creative and unique. Polly is the force deep down inside me, who throws caution to the wind.



Sometimes Polly's ideas take over and ooze to the surface:)

She whispers,

“How about lime green eye shadow!” 

and

“You could totally pull off Fire engine red highlights!”

and

“I think it’s time you got something pierced!”

Polly believes I'm an edgy, unique, badass artist. Polly can’t wait to open the door and RUN through to the other side with a bottle of wine and screaming, “Let’s get this party started!”

I often wish Polly was in charge.

If Polly was in charge, the door would never be closed in the first place. The door is occasionally closed because sometimes I’m scared.  

I’m scared if I open the door reality might sneak in. My dream bubble might burst. Achievement, Accomplishment and Success might tell me to get lost because only cool badass artists get to have Mocha Lattes and eat fresh chocolate chip cookies, and I am clearly an uncool boring poser.  

Sometimes, I think we all live too much under the fear of the "What Ifs", instead of listening to the inner voice screaming "What the Hell!"

Sometimes, I get up the nerve to throw the door wide open, but I think the handle might be stuck.

Or maybe, Polly has the key.

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Failure is my Bitch

So far, in my young life I have failed A LOT.

I’ve failed tests, I’ve failed classes, I’ve failed diets, I’ve failed interviews, I’ve failed business attempts and I’ve failed personal challenges.   

Sometimes I’ve failed by just a little bit. 

Other times I have fallen on my face so spectacularly that it took almost a full 10 count before I could get back up.

That is, when I did get back up. 

Unfortunately, there have been lots of times when I just gave up.

With many an excuse and justification, I convinced myself it wasn’t worth the effort to try again.

Do any of these sound familiar?

“I haven’t trained in a week, it’s too late to start again now, maybe next year.”

“I haven’t updated my blog in 2 weeks, I guess I’m not cut out to be a writer after all.”

“I cheated on my diet 4 times today, I might as well just give up and order a pizza. Maybe I’ll try and start again next month.”

Knowing we won’t have to face Failure again, isn't it so much easier to just give up? 

I’ve been thinking about Failure a lot lately. As I inch ever closer to beginning the 32nd year of my life, I’ve got A LOT going on.

I’ve started Polly, I’ve partnered in business with my best friend, and I’ve committed to a few really big projects.

I’ve got lots of big plans, even bigger goals, and almost astronomical dreams and as I plot and plan and set goals for my success, I can see Failure just around the corner.

With a  face full of smug satisfaction, he’s waiting for me. Knowing we will rendezvous very soon, in situations both big and small. With our history firmly in mind, he can’t wait to assert his mastery over me. Sure that I am his slave, he can’t wait to disrupt my momentum, destroy my dreams and drink in my self-loathing.

Failure is a sadist and he knows I am the perfect mark.

There is no way to avoid Failure. I know as I work towards achieving my goals we will meet again and again, but this time he will not have his way.

This time around I WILL succeed. I’ve got my Big Girl Panties on, and I’m not playing around!

Forget “Try, Try Again”, it’s time to GET SHIT DONE!

This time I'm going to punch Failure in his arrogant face and step on his neck as I hurdle towards success.

No whining. No excuses. Think big and make it happen.

This time is different.

This time,

Failure is my bitch!

Join me? #failureismybitch

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Desperate Measures

I am a wife and mother.

Miss M is almost 4.

Mr. Man sometimes acts like he is almost 4.

Difficult doesn’t even begin to describe the challenges of finding time to work or create.

I know I am not alone in my struggle.

Lucky for us all Polly is all about problem solving.

For each and every one of you who are like me and just need a little time to yourself I present the “Do Not F-ing Disturb” sign.

Found in an Italian hotel room on my first trip to Europe in ‘97, I’ve been holding onto this little beauty knowing that someday it would come in handy.

Unlike your average “Do Not Disturb Sign” this one is sure to get the message across.

If your loved ones cannot understand any of the 4 languages politely asking them to get lost and give you some space, the little white man is sure to drive the message home with his non-so-subtle universal gesture of,

“Please F@#K Off!”

Worried this sign will mortally offend your visiting Mother-in-Law? No need!

Explanations that the little man is politely asking for quiet, with a shushing finger to his lips are easily believable.

Which was most likely the original designer’s intention…

But really?!?!?!?

You see it too right?

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Live and Learn: A Must Read

Being a completely addicted bibliophile, very rarely can I walk into a book store and leave with ONLY the book I went in to buy.

On my last shopping trip I found this little beauty in the bargain pile, though I can't for the life of me understand why!


The Complete Live and Learn and Pass It On, by H. Jackson Brown, JR.


Written and Compiled by H. Jackson Brown, J.R., this book contains life lessons from people of every age.  Here are a few of my many favorites,

"I've learned that you'll never see a U-Haul trailer behind a hearse." - Age 59

 

"I've learned that if you throw ten socks in the laundry, only nine will come out." - Age 27

 

"I've learned that little boys cannot move about the house without making car sounds." - Age 36

 

"I've learned that a woman who can potty-rain triplets can do anythng." - Age 29

 

"I've learned that there should be an Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt not whine." - Age 62

H. Jackson Brown is amazing and has written many great books containing simple daily reminders of life lessons.  Remarking on his books, Jackson has said,

"Most of us know what we need to do to make our lives more fulfilled and useful, but sometimes we forget. My little books are gentle reminders of those simple things which, if done well and in a spirit of love, can significantly change our lives."

Well ain't that the truth!

What little life lessons have you learned so far?



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Parenting Shortcuts

This past winter our house went through a cycle of illness that never seemed like it was going to end.  Miss M would get sick, then I would, then Mr. Man, then the cycle would start all over again.

After what seemed like the 100^th go-around, enough was enough and Mr. Man and I decided it was time to disinfect the house. 

At the end of our long day of cleaning, we climbed into our freshly cleaned bed and Mr. Man shared the following parenting brilliance…

Me: Ahhhhh, I love the feel of clean sheets!

Mr. Man:  It’s so nice to know the sick has all been washed away.

ME:  Definitely!  Between washing all the sheets, and Lysoling everything nailed down, we have got to be officially germ free!

Mr. Man:  Ya, that’s why I Lysoled Miss M. Just to be on the safe side.

ME:  Um, huh?  You mean you sprayed her toys and stuff right?  You didn’t actually spray Lysol on our child?

Mr. Man and Miss M approx. a million Parenting Shortcuts ago

Mr. Man:  No, I meant what I said.   I told her to close her eyes, and then I sprayed her right in the face.  That’s where the sick was coming from, with the never ending running nose and constant coughing so it seemed like the best way to get rid of it.  Besides it says right on the bottle that it kills 99.9% of germs.  

Well, how can you argue with logic like that?

What are your favorite Parenting Shortcuts?

P.S.  Mr. Man was just pulling my chain, he didn’t actually spray Miss M in the face with Lysol… but knowing him, I’m sure he thought about it!

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